March 2009
13 posts
“You’re too busy looking at your icock.”
– Wife
Listen
Text Message Conversation between my wife and I.
WIFE: FWD: -Fwd Do not go to any walmart tonight. Gang initiation to shoot 3 women tonight. not sure which walmart. And confirmed on tv. fwd to all girls in ur phone
WIFE: did you get that walmart text yet. i already got it from 3 people
JJJ: I thought gang warnings went out in the 90s
WIFE: They’re back bitch
JJJ: No your text was the first.
WIFE: wow one of them came from your mom.
For Sean, forever ago.
National Treasure: Book of Sean
AdaptSean
SEAN mm
Captain Sean’s Mandolin
Sean Air
Sean At Heart
Seaning Arizona
also, see Sean in 60 seconds
“Any word you have to hunt for in a thesaurus is the wrong word. There are no...”
–
But I would of said search, seek, forage, look, scourer, or shakedown instead of hunt.
Listen
WatchI’m only listening to music by Men w/ Beards.
New Bonnie “Prince” Billy Video - “I Am Goodbye”
If I was A Rapper...
My name would be, Con Necty-cut
and this would be my new jam,
“Glory Love”__________________________________
(Con Necty-cut)
Hey Tonight it’s very clear Cause we’re both lying here There’s so many things I wanna say I will always love you I will never leave you alone Sometimes I just forget, say things I might regret It breaks my heart to see you crying I don’t...
In The Closet with Justin J Justin on the Long...
Justin J Justin – This is a real treat for all of you in the closet fans. We have the pinnacle of all guest, we may have shot our wad in only the second interview. Lady and Gentlemen, Justin Timberlake!
Justin Timberlake – Thank you.
JJJ – How about letting me see what’s in the Box, wink wink.
T Lake – Excuse me.
JJJ – May I call you T Lake?
T Lake – I’d rather not.
JJJ – Then we already have a problem. Ronald is over there typing away and he’s already abbreviated your name as T Lake in the above conversation.
T Lake – Can you go back and change it? That can’t be too hard?
JJJ – Look, JT---
T Lake – That’s better, I like JT.
JJJ – Don’t interrupt me, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, Ronald is slow. And I don’t, I don’t like to make things hard on him. I’m just sayin’, I’d do it if it were I typing this up. But it’s not.
T Lake – I just like JT better.
JJJ – then fine, Ronald get the white out.
JT – thanks
JJJ – So you know that if we stuck together and pulled an Ellen on this Town we could rule! The power would be over whelming. We’d be unstoppable. Not only would Sexy truly and definitively be back. It will be back with a King Kong sized wiener.
JT – Excuse me? Did you say—?
JJJ – Look I’m just saying, I’ll leave the wife and kids, you drop who ever your with this week. Is it who or whom? I never know. (Turning away) Ronald, check that!
JT – Get you hand off my knee.
JJJ – Look. JT Lake, I’m just trying to say this could be Amazing. Like an app that can take any song on your iPod, and play it back as if Neil Diamond was singing it.
JT Lake – You did it again?
JJJ – Did what?
JT Lake – I knew this was a bad idea, Lady GaGa told me all about your interview with her.
JJJ – What, because I totally read her poker face? She was bluffing. I went all in. She lost, end of story. Justin, really don’t be like this.
Justin – What do you mean, don’t be like this? Good night! (Justin Timberlake storms out of the closet.)
JJJ – Ronald, get in here. How do you think that went?
Ronald – I, I think…
JJJ – Yep, Nailed it, like that freshman on prom night.